Friday, February 29, 2008

Treasure


I know don't get too excited this is not aother post on the goodness of the profession of pirating and pillaging to earn one's living. Today I would like to divulge one of the world's best kept secrets that was discovered by many including a small fictional character named Matilda. In the dark, dreary ( col, for those of you not living in the sub-tropics of the US) winter a bright spot on the horizon is the local library.
One may wonder why this venue is the choicest beyond all others int eh winter, but let me explain. THe library is a WARM public place with more attractions than any theme park one could imagine. Best point there is no height requirement for entering this sanctuary from the cold. Therein the knowledge of the ages is contained for those seeking the wealth of man through reading. If you feel like learning a new language there are books and mind you audio tapes/ cds for the taking. If your kids need an enjoyable activity not only is there a section devoted to their interests but also story time, and activity days to foster the creative juices that might otherwise be expressed in hyperactive craziness. Even for those who don't want to read books there is a gamut of dvds to borrow. Furthermore if you haven't had time to subscribe to any magazine under the sun it is available for your perusal at tone of the convenient desks or over stuffed chairs.
The best part is this a resource to explore the inner self- no matter what area you might want to see if you have an active interest in you will be able to obtain some information whether over the internet, through the library exchange program, or from one of the many resources located on the shelves.
When entering the building one knows that they are embarking on a journey into another world guarded by a spectacled guard ensuring that no damage will be done to the revered atmosphere or the organization of the treasured, labeled and filed contents of the trove. THis may be intimidating to have someone watching over your ever move, but remember that behind the spectacles is a person who is simply trying to protect a resource that has no price. YES it is true if you are a careful person your access to this building is free of charge, and fee associated with mishap is minimal. SO please don't be one of those frustrating people at Barnes and Noble who gets three books then sits down to read all three without ever buying one. simply go to your local library, mine is literally a block away to the recent arrivals, and read your heart out.
The one down side to the library compared to Barnes and Nobles is that there is no snack bar, but if you check out a book, then the options for indulgence become unlimited at any of your family's favorite cafes, bakeries, or diners, thus ensuring that you won't spend $3 on the last stale chocolate chip cookie from the display case at a regular book store.
SO try it out, and if the librarian gives you a dirty look on your way in, give her a smile and head for the section of your choice, she is just jealous that you could read your books out of doors while she is shushing and filing for hours on end.
Rachel

Sunday, February 24, 2008

Tales of a Happy Dog: Part 1

For those of you looking forward to reading about my misery, I am sorry. This was a great week. It was so warm the first half of the week that Brian put me out on my rope for hours. I was able to get a head start at the weeds in the lawn (they are, after all, my enemy). And then even after it snowed they let me be out on my chain. I love playing in the snow.

But that is only the half of it. They took me to Petsmart to pick out a new rope (a replacement for the one they threw out last month.) So I picked out the best one I could find. You see, I have been having issues with the last few ropes and the evil tassels on the end of them. I like to tear them apart and spread the mess all over the house, but then the evil vacuum cleaner comes to the rescue. So this time, we got a rope made of polar fleece...nothing to chew, just lots to pull on. Maybe this will keep my enemy at bay.And finally, I invented a new game to play with the humans. It is called chase the puppy. Basically, they charge me, and then chase me all around the house. But when I turn around and growl......I get to chase them around the house, that is until I get them into a corner, at which time they chase me. Sometimes they will just just pretend to chase me, and then in my mad dash they will hide somewhere in the house. Then I get to use my nose to find them....Happy days for Dobson.

I do have one complaint for the week. Brian has started calling me fish head!!!

Your's Truly

Dobson

Sunday, February 17, 2008

Tales of a Disgruntled Dog: Part 4


I think the picture says it all. Brian got a new torture device. If only I had opposable thumbs, I would show him a thing or two about behaving. So I like to scratch the couch occasionally, is that really cause for fuss. At first I thought the had got me a new friend, you know, something innocent to chew on. Little did I know that I would be living every moment in fear of attack. So, if any of you have any ideas on what I can do to get back at them for this injustice, please let me know. I am open to suggestion...But I have already tried the following to no avail:
  1. Ate Rachel's new black shoes
  2. Shredded two books
  3. Torn up hotel room carpet
  4. Scratched the coffee table
  5. Thrown up on my bed
  6. Shed all over the house
  7. Spread toilet paper everywhere
  8. Barked at the neighbors
Please send help...Dobson


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Saturday, February 16, 2008

There is hope for communism

I understand that this blog has got me flagged by some FBI computer, and because of it, I will never be able to run for public office. But understand that I am a capitalist at heart, and 100% against communism. (Personally, I do not feel that most people are smart enough to get their pants on in the morning, why would I let them make all of my decisions) I think government's only right should be to protect me from all the crazies on the street, (that is, provide police, military, and courts) and that each bill signed into law is just another step towards socialism. (And now there are snipers on the neighbor's roof). Why do we not believe that the markets work themselves out.

But anyway, in the midst of my disgust for big government, I saw something that I liked. I was just recently reading one of my "tech nerd" news sources Slashdot, and came across the following headline China Bans Horror Movies. Wouldn't it be cool if the government had the ability to ban anything, like, lets say Stupid People. Of course it would be easy to determine who is stupid. I propose the following test:

1. Do you believe anything the current presidential candidates have promised will come to pass?

If no, proceed to question 2, If yes...You are Banned

2. Do you believe in God?

If yes, proceed to questions 3, If no...You are Damned (and banned...sorry)

3. Do you honestly believe we would be better in a system of socialized medicine?

If no, you get to stay, If yes...go move to Canada or Europe and leave us alone.

And while we are talking about banning things. The dog was just scratching at the couch and is now banned to his kennel.

Thursday, February 14, 2008

Valentine's Day Tribute

Hi it's Rachel the evil half of Brian's mind, please accept my deepest apology for actually attempting blogging on such an important day but I feel the myths surrounding one of the greatest gifts of love exchanged at this time of year need to be compiled and laid to rest. So to put your minds at easy please know that if you didn't get jewelry for valentines day, do not fret if your beloved thought to get you chocolate for in Mayan society chocolate was literally worth its' weight in gold. FUrthmore if your honey thought that flowers were too conventional and got chocolate instead realize that he still got you a plant of sorts for cocoa does come from a bean that grows in a pod that grows on a tree. Thus, one can still assume that your sweetheart had your. growning relationship at heart.
If you think that your prince has some diabolical plot to ruin your health by feeding you chocolate remember all the studies that have been published of late regarding the anti-oxidents contained therein. What a sweet person to look after your heart. Furthermore, the great giver of chocolate wants to ensure that no matter what else happens that you are able to maintain a sunny disposition as to the known fact that the consumption fo chocolate does contribute to the release of serotonin, the "happy" neurotransmitter. THey are not looking to ruin your skin either as chocolate also has not been proven to cause acne, and of late has been added to many beauty products for it beneficial effects. FInally chocolate is much better for your teeth than gummie goodies and stick toffees that might have otherwise be wrapped foryour benefit so you know that the great giver of chocolate enjoys seeing your radiant smile.
Remember that chocolate comes in many forms for our many preferences. ie no matter how fickle, hormonal pregnant, or neurotic you are there is a richness of chocolate that can bring enjoyment into your life. For instance chocolate beginners can start with the sweet innocent white or milk, while veterans with deeper palates can indulge int eh rich joy of ganache, fudge, or my favorite dark chocolate. CHocolate is like the little black dress of desserts it goes with almost everything.
Lastly remember caffine is also found in chocolate soooo good for those running on low, yet not wanting to put the holiday to bed without a goodnight kiss.

So if you recieved the gift of chocolate for Valentines day, thank the one you love. If not enjoy some for the sake of the one you love. And if this a Feb 14th is your code for single awareness day get together with anyone and share in some serotonin boosting goodness.

Saturday, February 09, 2008

Tales of a Disgruntled Dog: Part 3


Yep, this is me, hiding under the bed with my bone, patiently waiting for them to leave. What a week. Let's just say the Super bowl was nothing like I thought. It was 4 hours of running for my life. Not that I had a lack of new smells, or people to pull on my sock, but by the end of the night, I was pooped. Thursday night I got to go to the Kennel....my absolute favorite place. There were so many other dogs and I got taken on walks three times a day.

Anyway...I wanted to talk about the art of hiding a bone. It is particularly hard for me, being locked inside where there is no dirt. The trick is finding an area where I can either completely cover the bone or leave it completely exposed. My favorite spot is on the love sack. It works as follows, I jump up on the sack, dig a little to make a flap and place the bone in the hole. Finally, I can use my snout to push the flap over the bone. Like so:

video

Frustrating isn't it. Won't they let me outside? It is so fun when Rachel or Brian Sit on the sack and discover my bone, cause then I get to hide it again.

That just about says it all. I think am going to go find a shoe to destroy....

Dobson

Rootbeer Super Bowl Party


I know it has been a week now, but I thought I would just post some pictures from our super bowl party. Just imagine a dozen small children chasing the dog around for a few hours. In fact, the dog spent the rest of the week asleep under one of the coffee tables. I have had to do some editing of the photos...message me for details. Ironically, everyone left after the supposed game winning touchdown of the Patriots. Just goes to show you that it ain't over till the fat lady sings. And also, apparently if you tell a group of LDS MBA's to bring their favorite root beer, they all bring IBC. Is it (1) our constant struggle to be in the world but not of it, (2) our love for root beer in a glass, or (3) is it just all a coincidence? My vote is for number 2, but that may also be a direct result of 1.

Friday, February 08, 2008

Our quick trip to St. Louis


We just took an overnight trip to purchase the lighting for our house...much to our surprise. They have already completed the framing, exterior walls, and roof. Here is the link to the web album with the photos:
New House Pictures

Sunday, February 03, 2008

Tales of a Disgruntled Dog: Part 2


I think it will be customary for me to begin each week by airing my grievances, and let me tell you, the list is huge this week. Let me begin!
  1. Brian cut my toenails too short...ouch
  2. They changed my food, and my stomach has ached since
  3. It snowed yesterday....(Only bad because they won't let me out to play)
  4. Brian threw a snowball at me
  5. I had to hold "it" for 7 hours on Wednesday
  6. They turned on my enemy, the vacuum, three times
  7. I got stepped on
  8. I can no longer dig at the couch
  9. I was bathed twice, and brushed too many times to count...I am freakin molting...okay
  10. They threw away my favorite sock...and my big bone
As you can see, it has been an extra hard week for me. On a positive note, Tuesday morning they left the scriptures out again. This makes my 3rd time reading the Book of Mormon this year....How many of you can say that. Also, Brian let me help shovel the walks twice. (But he kept me tied to the garage door)

This week looks to be pretty uneventful, although I overheard Brian making kennel reservations for next week. Hopefully I can get them to change their minds. I want to go to St. Louis too. I am really excited for later today because the Browns are having friends over to watch something that they call the Super Bowl...I can't wait to see what food is inside it. Extra attention for me for the rest of the day.

Please send help.......Dobson

Saturday, February 02, 2008

Winning is over rated!


Most people have never seen my competitive side. However, put me into a good game of Mario Party, well, Mario anything, and it just may shock you. I turn from the adorable Brian that everyone loves, in to the scariest thing you will ever see. But this post has nothing to do with that, in fact, it has nothing to do with Jenga either. I just wanted you to all see how tall the tower was right before I lost to my wife the other night. And that is the issue I would like to address to you....the art of losing.

Any of my close friends would know that I will do almost anything for the story. For example, three years ago we had just finished the "Thanksgiving Rounds". We had literally cooked three thanksgiving dinners, and could not bear the thought of making our own. Because of that, we decided to enjoy a nice dinner out at....Chuck o Rama! I cannot even begin to tell the stories generated from being around "Buffet" folk on a family holiday. For the first time in a long time, I felt under dressed, and it was at a chuck o rama. But I digress!

For exampleThe first reason that I love to lose, is that no one questions the validity of the story. Or in other words, it is easier to lie. Am I right? Just think about it, anytime you hear some outlandish story with a happy ending, you think "Sure you did!" But if your story ends in tragedy, the audience is so stunned that you are telling them your failures, they assume the rest of the story to be true., I once picked up the 7-10 Splits in bowling....(All of you are going "yeah right") But if I would have said that one time I picked up 7-10 split, but I crossed the foul line so the stupid computer didn't count it......everyone is thinking...poor, poor Brian.

The second reason lies deep within my love for drama. The winners victory dance is considered vain and prideful, usually creating ill will towards the person. The losers dance is completely acceptable, and usually a lot more funny.

If all winning does is create unbelief and ill will, I choose to lose! That said, I did not choose to lose at Jenga last night. I had removed the final legal piece (Took me a good five minutes) and the stupid dog bumped the table as I was placing it on top. I was framed!!!!!!